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For women who want to get pregnant, pregnancy announcements are happy and exciting. But what about women who got pregnant unexpectedly and aren’t sure what to do now?
If you find yourself in this situation, you probably worry about how to tell the people around you your big news. You worry about how they might react and how your pregnancy might affect your relationship with them.
Follow these tips to make telling your loved ones a positive experience.
Telling Your Significant Other
The first person you should tell is your significant other, if applicable. While you may need a little time to process your emotions first, you should tell them as soon as possible. Keeping the subject secret can cause misunderstanding and conflict.
Wait for a good time to talk when you’re both at a low stress level. For example—don’t break the news right when your significant other gets home and before they’ve had some time to unwind.
Ask your significant other if you can sit down and talk so they know the situation is serious. Remove distractions by turning off the TV and putting your phones away.
Finding out you’re going to have a child is life-changing news, and it’s hard to predict how your significant other may react. Let them know that the two of you don’t need to make any official decisions just yet while you’re still processing the news.
Telling Your Family
Breaking the news to your family can be extremely difficult. In many cases, parents are protective, and hopefully they want what’s best for you. They might have a vision in their mind of how your life is going to go, and your pregnancy might not fit into their plans.
It’s a good idea to write down what you want to say before you meet with your family. This can help you process your emotions and can prepare you for the conversation.
How you conduct the conversation is up to you. Perhaps you want to meet privately with your parents and let them talk to your siblings later. Maybe you and your significant other want to sit down and talk to the whole family together. Choose the format that makes you most comfortable, and let your family know beforehand that you have something important to tell them.
When to tell your family is up to you as well. Some people wait until they’re pregnant for 10 to 12 weeks to share the news because the risk of miscarriage drops at that point in the pregnancy. However, you may want to tell your family sooner in order to receive their support as soon as possible.
Telling Your Boss
Telling your boss can be particularly tricky because your pregnancy may affect your work. If you work with hazardous materials, you should let your boss know right away so he or she can adjust your responsibilities. It’s also important to have a conversation with your boss if you’re experiencing morning sickness or other conditions that affect your ability to work.
If these situations don’t apply, you can wait to tell your boss until you’ve been pregnant for three months or so. Share the news in a private meeting with your boss. Remember, pregnancy is a fact of life, and there’s no need to apologize to your boss for being pregnant. Just be straightforward and direct while you share the news. Your boss will appreciate your honesty.
Hopefully, your company will allow you to take time off for maternity leave. Even if you plan to have your child adopted, you’ll still need some time to recover after childbirth. You may not know all your plans right away, and you’re not obligated to say what they are. Just tell your boss that you’ll let him or her know as soon as you decide.
Telling Your Friends
When people are excited about their pregnancy, they often create a pregnancy announcement to share through mail, email, or social media. You can do the same if you feel comfortable doing so, or you could simply tell your friends in person.
Even if you weren’t planning to have a baby at this point in your life, it’s still an exciting occasion and an opportunity to celebrate a new life. You can acknowledge the hard points of the situation while still being hopeful about the future.
Some of your friends may judge you or decide not to stay friends with you, and that can be difficult. True friends stand by you in both good times and bad. Your closest friends can be a source of support and comfort during this time.
Telling your friends and family you’re pregnant can be very difficult. Follow these tips to make the process easier.
If you are considering adoption and need support during your pregnancy, contact a birth-mother specialist at A Child’s Dream. We offer counseling and medical and housing assistance for expectant mothers.
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