Birth Mother Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
How to give up a baby for adoption
Adoption is a positive alternative to an unplanned pregnancy. Many women who find themselves in a crisis pregnancy situation do not search out all of their options. An adoption plan can be whatever you want it to be, and we will work with you to create one that works for you.
The decision to place your baby for adoption is not an easy one to make on your own. It can be very difficult, and even painful. We understand that, and we also commend you for making the choice to put your baby’s needs before your own. Our trained staff and social workers will help you work through your pain, and approach it in light of the gift you are giving someone else. Our agency also provides professional counseling at no cost to the birth parents.
Yes! You have the option to select the parents who will be adopting your baby. Each adoptive family makes a profile, which is a scrapbook full of pictures and stories of their family history, and their lives together. The family also includes a Dear Birth Parent letter, which addresses other questions you may ask about them, such as, religious preference, likes and dislikes, hobbies, etc. We will present several of these profiles to you based on criteria you give us, and allow you to select your adoptive couple from them.
All prospective adoptive parents must go through intensive background checks. Social workers also work with them in their home several times, to interview them, and observe their home life and relationships to one another. The adoptive parents are also required to provide a State Bureau of Investigation report as well as a child abuse clearance report. They must also provide birth certificates, a copy of their marriage license, physician reports that include HIV test results, etc. All of this information must be completed, before they are placed with birth parents, and should this work not be approved and completed they will not be able to adopt the baby.
The level of relationship you have with the adoptive parents is completely your choice. If you like, they can come out to meet you before the baby is born, or you can meet at the hospital. You also have the option to have them attend doctor’s appointments or be in the delivery room with you. Many birth parents find it eases the process to form a close relationship with the adoptive parents, and call them or visit often before and even after the birth. However, you can also choose to have no contact with them at all. Also, you can change your mind regarding the openness of your relationship at any time during the adoption.
You may move forward with the adoption, however the law requires that every effort must be made to locate the birth father and gain his consent, or terminate his parental rights, in order for the adoption to proceed.
Our adoption coordinating staff can help you get to and from your doctor’s visits as well as take you to pick up prescriptions. If further assistance is needed (i.e. trips to the grocery store, a ride to work, etc.) our staff will be glad to arrange a ride for you. We understand how important it is that you stay healthy and well taken care of.
The choice of adoption is always at no cost to the birth parents. The adoptive family will provide the portion of the medical expenses not covered by private insurance or by state funds.
Our adoption coordinating staff can help you in making that decision. Our adoption coordinating staff can help you in making that decision. The time you spend with your baby in the hospital will create very special memories.
The adoptive family usually arrives a day or two before your due date, and is at the hospital while you are in labor. They can even be in the delivery room with you. If you deliver before your due date, they will be on the next flight out of their hometown.
After the baby is discharged from the hospital, the adoptive family will take the baby to their hotel suite. They will receive clearance to leave the state, usually five to ten days after discharge, and will then take the baby home.
There are times when we do not have enough notice to have the adoptive parents at the hospital before the baby is released. These cases are few and far between, however, when necessary we provide transitional care for the baby. We have specific families as part of our transitional care program, who have been screened intensively before being chosen, and provide excellent care during the period of time before the adoptive parents arrive.
Though the Court does have the right to request your personal appearance and testimony, this is usually not the case. Generally, a written consent to adoption will be more than acceptable, for which no personal appearance is required.
The agency will provide court approved living expenses to those birth parents who are in need of help. We understand how difficult it is to get back on your feet and return to work after delivery.
As the birth parent, you have the right to receive ongoing information regarding your baby. Our agency requires that the adoptive parents be open to sending pictures and letters at least twice a year for the first five years, and then once a year until the child is eighteen. You are also able to send the adoptive parents letters and pictures through our agency. The adoptive parents will also send their letters, gifts, and pictures through our agency.